Interview With an LGBTQIA+ Employee

During LGBTQIA+ history month, we’ve been privileged to see many lines of communication opening up among our network; it’s inspiring to see in action the way we can raise awareness and acceptance by speaking out and by opening our minds.

One contact close to the team was generous enough with their time to sit down with Host and talk candidly about their experiences as a member of the LGBTQIA+ community, giving some insights into what the world of work (and beyond) is often like for bisexual folks specifically, as well as some mindful advice for both employers and colleagues which we can all benefit from taking a moment to reflect on.

Read on for the full interview…

What is your experience of A) hiding or not addressing your sexuality in the workplace, and B) of deciding to be more vocal about it?

I know I am still only young, and I have not worked at a lot of companies but to be completely honest I haven’t addressed my sexuality in any workplace or even at university. My close friends are the only people who know. I feared how my fellow employees/people around me would react, and that people would care. I also thought that disclosing my sexuality to university or an employer could impact me negatively, obviously after now having read up on it, I know this is discrimination and is illegal.

I have only just decided to be more vocal about it in honour of LGBT history month and this is because I read the Host blog which said that ‘2 in 5 bisexual people is not ‘out’ to their colleagues’. It was then that it clicked I did not have to hide who I really am at work. I knew just how supportive people at Orbis would be and that it's ok to be myself here.

Do you think that not feeling able to be open about your sexuality or any aspect of your lifestyle impacts people's performance at work?

Definitely. If you feel like an outsider or uncomfortable in your workplace, or if you are unable to be open about your sexuality, this will of course affect people’s work performance. Feeling isolated and alone at work often leads to people within the LGBTQIA+ community facing even more pressure to perform to ‘prove’ themselves that they can do the job.

Any specific challenges that the bisexual community face that you would like to highlight?

I have recently read an article which contained a study from Stanford which stated only 19% of bisexuals surveyed are out to people they care about, compared with 75% of gay people. I am only out to a few friends due to a negative response I received when I was seventeen. This was the very first person I told, also a member of the LGBT+ community, and they told me that I was just ‘confused’ and I should ‘just pick a side’. This made me worry so much that the way I felt was not normal and that there was something wrong with me. From then, I did not tell anyone else until I met an entirely new group of people at university.

Unfortunately, this is such a common occurrence within the bisexual community – there are so many stereotypes about our sexual orientation, that it is something we will ‘grow out of’, like it’s a pair of shoes. There is a definite issue with bisexual people feeling like outsiders within wider society, but also within the LGBTQIA+ community.

If a member of the LGBTQIA+ community is feeling uncomfortable in their work environment... what would be your Step 1 advice to their employer or colleagues?

If someone expresses to you that they are uncomfortable at work, then I would advise that the employer/colleague makes time to have a proper conversation about this. Let the person in question know that there is someone there for them and create a safe space for them to speak about their feelings and concerns freely. It is all about the support they know they can receive.

The most important thing is that the individual is supported and has someone who they feel they can speak to – having a workplace LGBTQIA+ network is a great way to do this. Including members of the LGBT community and allies within a group / network shows that inclusion is something everyone can act on. A further piece of advice to employers would be to hold events centred around education on gender identity, sexual orientation, microaggressions, etc. Sessions provided by a workplace can help a workplace become a more inclusive place. Education is key.

What is your opinion on the balance between openness and respecting colleagues’ privacy, how can we strike a good balance?

Just simply treating everyone like you want to be treated – do not ask someone something you would not be comfortable answering yourself. If someone is a member of the LGBTQIA+ community, you may be curious to learn more about their sexuality or gender identity, however some questions might be considered invasive by some people, whereas others may not care at all and freely answer.

If you want to know more, try to do some research yourself and just be considerate of people’s feelings. Pay close attention to how someone speaks to you and mirror the language they use to describe their own gender identity. Openness can be shown through allyship, acknowledging important events within the ‘LGBT calendar’, working hard to encourage participation from everyone in the workforce and amplifying people’s voices!

Special thanks to this interviewee for your time and honesty, and helping us to put LGBTQIA+ voices in the spotlight.